The Italian Job

It’s been so long since I saw the remake that I’ve forgotten most of the details.  I remember Ed Norton (in a role that doesn’t seem to exist in the original, unless I’m mistaken) and Seth Green as the annoying nerd and the Mini Coopers… and that’s about it.  I’d even completely blanked on who the stars were.  So comparisons will not be forthcoming, which is probably just as well.

I love me some heist movies, I really do.  And part of the joy of heist movies is the meticulous preparation, the clever planning.  Unfortunately, we don’t get much of that here.  The plans are handed to Michael Caine, fully prepared.  Even the tools to complete the job are prepared.  No one needs to work out much of anything.  You kind of wonder what the first hour of this movie is for, because nothing much of consequence happens.  We get the famous “blow the bloody doors” off scene (which doesn’t really live up to the hype of being so frequently quoted, but maybe nothing could) and the scenes establishing Noel Coward as the kingpin financier operating from within prison are pretty neat.  Everything else is rather forgettable up until the heist itself.  Which is to be commended for its fantastic car choreography.  Seeing those little Mini Coopers zip around anything and everything is a blast, and easily the highlight of the film.  Probably the most enjoyable car chase footage I’ve seen besides Blues Brothers.

It’s too bad nothing much else in the movie matches the entertainment level of those little cars.  The heist itself is mildly clever, but again, it’d be more satisfying to see more of the planning.  Caine and Coward are both a lot of fun, but the rest of the cast is either blah or Benny Hill… who I had hoped I’d never have to see again in my life.  Fortunately it’s quite a small role, but that doesn’t spare us from his dumb leering and ass-grabbery.  The Quincy Jones score is really spot on a lot of the time, but at the film’s climax you’re tormented with one of the most irritating songs I’ve heard in a long time.  It plays into the film’s sometimes overwhelming British pride, which I guess is fun if you’re English but it got kind of annoying for me.  I do want to applaud the ending, though.  I could make a terrible pun but it would be a giveaway (and it’s probably been made a thousand times before), so I’ll just say it’s a real hoot.

Except for that song and being reminded of Benny Hill, I didn’t truly hate anything in the film.  But except for the brilliant car chase and the final few minutes, I didn’t truly love anything about it, either.  Rating: Fair

IMDb